Warning serious thread: Lessons learned from BB

[Admin]

The petition which was signed by over 500 forum members was sent to the CPW, BB, C4, OFCOM and some newspapers.

I have received a reply from the CPW stating that they will investigate the incident on BBBM. But I somehow doubt anything will come of the investigation.

I also made a complaint to OFCOM, BB, C4, Beat Bullying as an individual. I have only received the standard reply from these complaints.

The thing is that BB has become a vehicle for such behavior from BB5 and fight night. It pulls in the ratings and we as individuals can only do so much.

Maybe we should write an article for the website on bullying and get someone from the Beat Bullying campaign to write something also.

[tweety]

Slightly off topic, but I sent a couple of emails of complaint to Ch4 and BBLB and received only one reply. That was one where I (in a really bad mood and extremely angry!) accused the show of cheating her out of a chance to win when they did the Machiavellian task thingy. I thought it absurd that they basically engineered a task to tell the HMs and viewers that she was "manipulative". They responded by mentioning my point about "cheating her the chance to win" - seemed to hit home a bit with them.

I do wonder if all the emails of complaint might perhaps have led to Ash not getting a fair representation on the latest Winners Week programme. I do think the complaints contributed to a more positive view of Ash on the sister shows in the last couple of weeks. I also think they might have contributed to Davina being nice to her on the final show. But perhaps it annoyed the powers that be in the long term???

[odm]

Hi everyone, Im glad I noticed this thread and yes it is an excellent Post from the OP. It is as you have all said here one of the very reasons we united thoughts and feelings.

I dont know whether I am just hard on reality to point out that though there was bullying of Ais in the house this year, bullying has always been a problem in society. The one thing regarding the watching of BB this year is that it brings it to light and encourages people such as ourselves to act on it and show our distaste. Bullying though is rife. It is and was part of my own life, and certainly a part of some of the other Fakers and that is why we recognised the ill treatment of Aisleyne. I dont think we can cure bullying by any means. I dont even think Aisleyne could be a strong enough figure to promote this either simply because it has become part of life today and no longer seems relevant. Harsh but true. People are much tougher and immune these days and care very little about the impact of their words and actions.

We have to remember how our Society is. I dont want to be boring or poo poo things, but we have to take this subject a lot further than Aisleyne and consider how the world has changed. Todays youngsters are far more assured and confident than the ones of say 30-40 years ago. We have so much more going on in Society, more technology, more explicit media, more access to information etc than we ever had. Children get to see and have access to exactly the same things. Not every parent is vigilant. We might all stand for common decency, but we do not have the rest of society behind us. Today, despite the fact that it really makes me cross, a lot of people could not care less as long as they are alright. It is the truth Im afraid. Ive seen kids pouring out of schools some really very small and they have all the attitude of someone of about 15-16. Its all about Grab and Go in this age.

Standing up for principles and human rights slips right over the top of most peoples head. Basically, they could,nt give a monkeys. However, its true to say that many people watched BB this year. Its why they watched it that matters however, and I bet you will find it was not for the reason of hoping for justice for Aisleyne in the house. It is almost criminal to say these things as it appears I am pouring cold water on what is said here. Far from it though. I just think that society has removed itself from much that matters. Its a quick fix life these days and very little time for anything that has any real depth. This is not a mundane view but a view I feel that is nearer the truth. People actually call the Fakers....' The Church of Ais'. They see us as a group of goody bodys who are making some sort of shrine to Aisleyne. Of course that is just poop. We are making a statement about respect and decency. That is what drives us as well as our abhorrence of bullying and the destroying of someones confidence.

What we must remember though is what we have all seen is through our own eyes. Its what WE all think happened to Aisleyne whilst in the house.

Aisleyne could come out of there do magazine shoots, become an even more beautiful and highly sought after model and never actually think to turn her hand to matters of correcting human behaviour.

If we are to fight against bullying we need to do so as a group feeling that way as a general whole. Not as a group who felt it for Aisleyne or even just because of Aisleyne. As none of us anyway could ever guarantee any backing from her..we have to be honest about this peeps...though I am sure she is a lovely woman, she may not have the time to consider this..who knows?

However, as far as bullying goes on TV and particularly in BB where there are a great many people watching inclusive of the young, it is a good point to push forward our complaint.

I do however think that this society is harder than it used to be and shallow needs are catered for too easily in the younger generation worldwide.. It is a very great battle people. Though I myself would love to see a world that is full of respect and love. It has to start somewhere, yes, it could start with us. I still do think though we also need to be realistic. There are lots of deaf ears in the path of reaping money.

[adorabora]

ODM, I for one agree with you, to push forward a cause against bullying, (Aisleyne who although united the Fakers) is perhaps not the right flag to fly, we are a voice and we need as a group to be uniting in this cause. I am sure we have among us Fakers who no how we can take this forward. School forums early years, primary schools, youth clubs, I dont know but I am sure as a group we could get something started and we need to be talking to the youngsters as well the parents. Magazines for the all ages, maybe we could get something into these. Large oaks grow from small acorns.

[Harvestgoddess]

I also agree with ODM if we are to do something about this together we need to focus on the bigger picture not just what happened to aisleyne and we have no way to ensure aisleyne would highlight this for us allthough in my heart i would like to think she would .
I myself was bullied and also my daughter pz its a lonely and tough experience and i wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy. if we are to do something lets do it together i am 100% behind any path that is decided upon its about time people stood up for what is right and decent .

[gwenyth]

yes, after watching BB for years I had never read or posted on their forums before,. Something changed this year, I have bullying issues - don't worry won't bore you all with them- but it really upset me to see the way Ais was treated - and the evicted housemates re-entry fix. Finding people on the site standing up for Ash and campaining against not only her treatment but as angry as I was that we to were being bullied by the ''you decide' comment being turned upside down. It wasn't so much the phone bill issue but the blantant disregard of other human beings, and their belief they were 'all powerful' enough to get away with it.
I moderate a large website, but rarely post on it - to my suprise I was soon posting away on BB with People Power and anti bulling themes.
Before long I had four stars and wondered what I was doing.
Somehow BB had touched a raw nerve - but Aiselyne had touched my heart too, like Caz par I 'adopted' her too. I already have 3 kids and 5 grandkids, a cat and a dog, but it seemed so awful that she was being overlooked all round, from her mother, to housemates, and Endemol.
I was proud when she came 3rd, and although I found the BB forum was increasingly populated by inarticulate louts I was lothe to leave as there were some fantastic posters on there, saying things so much better than me. and I also wanted to keep up with news of Aisleynes progress.
Now I can leave BB Official to the trolls, although I do wonder what their moderators were doing sometimes, so very happy to talk seriously on here.
Hoping one day someone will say ''hello ''because its my first day.
Nice meeting you all.
x

[gwenyth]

hi again -( told you my nickname was brain of a duck) - forgot to add that I would be most happy to support any campaign against media bullying.
I received no replies from my emails to Oftel and Ictis - apart from the standard 'thank you for your comments'
I was commenting I was asking for fairplay

[premierscfc]

lynw1 said:

It is great to see we are making friends and having fun , but I just felt that a bit of what the FAKERS were about was addressing the serious issues Aisleyne was facing. I just wanted to bring some of that spirit back whilst having fun elsewhere on this great forum! So I have put down some of the thoughts I have had since BB7 finished.

GMTV are running an anti bullying campaign for kids going back to school. This has reminded me of the anger and dismay I felt whilst watching BB this year. It as also made me think of the wider impact this years BB might have on the younger viewers.

I wonder how many of the bullies are returning to school renewed with the confidence that they are the ‘cool’ ones, after watching the TV. Throughout the summer we have seen threatening and intimidating behaviour encouraged by the producers of the Big Brother and sister programmes. Previous housemates used aggressive attitudes and used the words “beat her up” and “Sort her out” to campaign for their re-entry into the house.

This was never addressed as unacceptable behaviour; in fact it was applauded and used by the programme makers to increase the public interest in voting back ex housemates and to restore the ‘entertainment value’ of the programme.

I fear that the children returning to school will have learned some interesting lessons during their school holidays, such as:

· It is OK to throw water to deliberately humiliate someone, after all it is not physical violence as it didn’t hurt, and it is excusable if you are under the age of 20.

· If you call someone a moose and throw water over them you can be called a ‘great housemate’ and you can get magazine deals and fame and fortune.

· You can call someone a sl@g and pretend to be intimidated by them to gain sympathy from your peers, you will then be seen as the most popular and the most entertaining,

· You can threaten to “sort someone out” and you will be rewarded with the opportunity by the authorities, as this may be entertaining to watch.

· You can undermine someone with cutting remarks and convince them that they are disliked enough to make the person feel worthless and to emotionally break down. This will not be your fault, as it will be seen as a character flaw in the person concerned.

· If you are feeling threatened or feel isolated by the group, you must not say anything as you will be seen as a weak individual and possibly be viewed as someone pretending to be upset to gain attention.

I am sure all of these lessons will be very useful to the bullies returning to school, and the victims will have learned that they have less of a voice to shout out about bullying than they had before. This worries me a great deal and I really feel that these irresponsible programme makers should address this issue.

My complaint to OFCOM was about the bullying and incitement of violence shown on BBBM by the ex housemates. I don't think we have heard the last of this because there were certain aspects of this years BB that made me feel uncomfortable.

[tellurianna]

if FAKERs are not only fans of Aisleyne but also an anti-bullying outfit... you can count me IN.

I emailed CarPhone Warehouse about BBBM... got a standard reply. Time to follow up me thinks.

[adorabora]

Childline on todays news stated that 1 of every 4 children rang them about being bullied, this is tragic and these are the ones who ring, how many more must there be who cant or dont ring Childline.